Half way there!

So this Saturday Londyn will be the big 6 months. Wow! Can you believe it?! I feel like just yesterday I was in the hospital learning how to nurse her. Here she is growing up and adventuring out.
I had a dear friend who recently started her child at KK and she cried when she dropped off. Oh do I remember those days! I began laughing at myself that day because I cried over many things. First I cried because this little miracle survived in me for 9 months. Second I cried within 5 minutes of being at home the first day, because I was in charge of her. Third, I cried because she would cry in the car and there was nothing I can do for her. Fourth I cried because she had a belly ache and I tried everything. Fifth, I cried because I had to leave her for 8 hours out of the day so I could work. I knew how much of an influence her sitter would have on her and how little time I would see her in a day. The last time that I cried for her was when she slipped out of her stroller because I didn't buckle her in.
The reason that I laughed is because some of those things were so small, but so big at the time.
We have survived 6 months of her life and I think so far so good:). Now I have count downs. She will be eating baby food, sitting up, crawling, walking, coming to kk in 6 months, and turning the big 1 years old. Keith is convinced that Londyn should not have a birthday party. However, I am already imagining it. It will probably be bright colors because she likes Red and Hot Pink items. We will have a special cake or cupcake for her to eat. She will dig in (as she is already trying to eat our food) and make a fun filled mess. There will be tears shed because we didn't think that her birth would be successful. Family will be rejoicing with us. I am sure she will be spoiled with lots of toys (in the mind of a baby:)).
I love being her mommy and teaching her the way to go. Happy 6 months my sweet Londyn

Wanting the best for Londyn

Lately I have felt a lot of pressure from different people about letting Londyn go. You see she stays with me for church, I like her with us as much as possible (she will not want this forever), and I am having a hard time leaving her with other people than family and Heather. It's not that I don't trust that people can do it, it's that I want the best for my child. I want her to grow up knowing that we have always wanted the best for her. Sometimes I have a hard time because I know that every one parents differently and what if they try to care for Londyn in a way that I don't see fit.
I have really tried to let go and let more people adventure with her, maybe it's because the guilt trip is played, not for sure.
I do know this though, I worked hard to get this little girl and I don't want to ever lose her. It wasn't easy bringing her into this world, and I want to care for her and give her the best. I don't think that there is anything wrong with being picky, I am hoping that someday others see that too.
I love that girl and I am her mommy. I will always have a say in who she hangs out with or stays with. I think that what we do and allow today will be the judge of her future.
Don't we all want the best for our children? Should I loosen up some? Should I hand her off to more people? I am not sure that I know the answer to that. I do know, however, that there is nothing wrong with wanting the best. She's an investment!
I am so glad that God is trusting me with her! Thank you Jesus for sending me your Angel