Friday, February 19, 2010

Let go and let God

I have never really gotten involved in Lent years past. I don't really remember it being talked about or celebrated raising up. This year I have really pondered on what it should be that I give up for the first time. My whole life I have tried over and over again to give it all to God, as I stated in yesterday's blog. I always took things to the alter praying that I would leave them there, I don't know that I can honestly say that I have always done that. It is hard to give full control to someone I have never "physically" met. So this year I am working on giving up control and letting God. So for Lent I can't say that many would think that it is a true sacrifice, however, for me it is huge. I am the biggest scardy cat you have ever met. I don't like scary movies, staying home by myself, watching local news in fear that something scary is happening in Lafayette. I also think that there is someone that hides on in the closet at night and someone who always wants in the apartment after we go to bed. In the recent months Keith has started to leave a kitchen light on for me so I can see into the front of the apartment. As well as, leaving the bathroom light on so I can see down the little hallway. I am going to face my fears in the next 38 days and lean on God for comfort rather than a light.
Last night was the first night in this for me, I got a late start. When I woke up at 2 to go to the bathroom, I laid in bed hoping that the urge would go away so that I didn't have to face the dark apartment. It didn't so I bravely got up, reminding myself that God is my protector. 4 oclock came around and I did it again. The second time a little less brave getting back to the bedroom.
Like I said I know that it is silly for many, however it is a huge step for me to let God be in control.
I have to remind myself that I serve a Mighty God!

No comments: